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That just happened

March 11, 2010

Walking in the office past the cube of a coworker (with child), who I do not know really well.

Coworker: Hey! Want to see pictures of babies?

Me: No.

(awkward pause)

Me: Ummm, that’s not the right answer, is it? Yeah, sure, I’ll look at babies.

***Oops.***

I felt bad, but then she showed me pictures of her brother in law’s NEWborn twins. And by NEW, I mean brand new, maybe 5 minutes old, naked, still covered with lots of goo. It is a beautiful thing when you are there, I am sure. But I don’t understand why people think The General Public wants to see these sorts of pictures. Or pictures of you breastfeeding for the first time. No thank you, facebook.

My colleague was jumping up and down. I grimaced smiled politely. I do like a cute baby or a funny toddler every now and then. But even if you’re not infertile, I think you have to be related to or good friends* with someone to get excited about the cream-cheese-covered baby pictures, no?

*or barren blog friends! I will rejoice over your gooey babes! Though honestly, one cleaned-up picture would do.

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10 comments

  1. Haha, too true. I’m even more a fan of the day or two later pictures, when the kid’s face has filled out a little bit :).
    Too funny that you just said “no”. Priceless.


  2. That’s really funny that you said no, then decided that probably wasn’t the right answer. I don’t know why they couldn’t have showed the cuter pictures from a day or two later.


  3. I’m with you…I’d prefer to see a nice cleaned up baby…no goo for me. Eekkk….that is a little “strange” to show baby pictures right out of the womb. hmmmm……I guess some people don’t get it. :0


  4. Yeah, I would have been a bit grossed out too, not to mention the sad reminder of IF. At my school, 2 of the older teachers just love showing everyone pictures of their grandbabies. I try to walk more quickly down the hall. 🙂


  5. I think with technology, common courtesy goes out the window. I promise not to post any immodest pictures.


  6. I almost spit out my water when I read that you said “no”! That is perfect. Thanks for the chuckle. I agree with the gooey-bits, I really don’t need to see that unless it is coming out of me… and even then I am not so sure.


  7. My best friend is going to deliver her third baby on Monday and I’m so glad that we’re going to be away. I just can’t handle a newborn right now.

    I agree, there has to be some degree of closeness to beam over goo-covered newborns. Eeew.


  8. Hahahaha!! I would have stopped at “no,” and then walked away!

    And you’re right, gooey newborn pictures are gross. I got one from my ex-BFF’s AH (a-hole husband, that is), and it was complete with a half-naked mother. WTH?? Pull your gown up, no one wants to see that shit.

    And my sister is famous for saying newborns are ugly. All newborns. I think she kind of has a point there, though I’m sure it’s beautiful to the mother 😛


  9. I’m with TCIE’s sister. And FTR my perspective that NEWborns are ugly predates IF and applies to my beloved baby siblings as well. As my father accurately noted, my 4yo brother was born looking “like a purple chicken.” He looks fine now. And I’m talking about cleaned-up newborns. I’m not sure there’s anyone close enough to me that I WANT to see their kids with birthing material. That certainly includes my siblings, and thankfully my parents neither took nor shared pictures of them covered in afterbirth, which I would NOT have shared with third parties if they had. I like to think I’m even-handed about this. If my officemate says, “Want to see a picture of my new girlfriend?” and I say yes, I am consenting to see a picture of a smiling woman in a party dress, heels, and makeup, probably next to my coworker. I will also accept jeans and a sweater with her dog. If he has pictures of her vomiting with her mascara all over her face and beer matted in her hair after partying too long, he needs to ask for particularized consent before showing them to others.

    (Is it possible she shoved the cute six-week-old pictures in her desk and showed you the horror-movie baby pictures because you said “no” the first time??)


  10. Yes, I said “no,” but then she just stood there, staring at me, with a dopey grin on her face. And there was no way to get out of it gracefully.

    I think the babies were born that very day, and these were the only pictures she had of them. She showed them to me on her computer.

    Misfit, I like your analogy to a “girlfriend” picture. hilarious.



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